I'm depleted of energy after teaching 3 days in a row. I'm facing long and arduous delay after delay in the publication of my Bible study book. I can't even "hire" an agent because I don't have a big enough "platform" (a.k.a. "following). And I've "failed" in a message that should have been an easy success (at least, from my feeble and presumptious viewpoint).
I know this is self-pity to the hilt! Did you see all the "I's"? But to tell you the truth, I don't feel guilty, because I know my Abba still loves me! Yes, even in the midst of my self-pity! In fact, "My Abba is very fond of me" as Brennan Manning used to say.
Can you identify, dear friend? And do you know that very same truth...your Abba still loves you, even your self-pitying you! He is very fond of you too, so much so that He will meet you in all the mess!
He met me in the midst of my mess the other day...with just a word! Can I tell you about it?
As I was emotionally "crashing and burning" from all of the above listed stresses (and some), I cried out to the Lord,
Jesus, give me something...just a word...please!
Immediately, the words all, every, fullness came into my mind. I knew them to be key words in my favorite letter of the apostle Paul's, the letter to the Colossians. As my eyes began to take this beautiful Christ-exalting book of Scripture in, the Holy Spirit "highlighted" a word in chapter 1, verse 17:
...in Him, all things hold together!
Wow! He holds it all!
HOLDS was my word that day.
I sensed that He was saying that all the things in my life that seem to be totally out of control are NOT! Why? Because HE holds them all together!
Then He brought to mind another verse from my other favorite Bible book:
He holds all things by His powerful word! Hebrews 1:3
HE holds it all!
I don't have to do the holding, the struggling, the striving to figure out the why's and wherefore's! What freedom!
So I embraced my word that day, and walked it out in peace.
What are your struggles, your frustrations, your blankness and doneness? No matter what it may be or how much self-pity you are wallowing in, cry out to the Lord! Ask Him for a WORD...just one.
He loves you...even your self-pitying, struggling you. Your Abba is very fond of you.
Then your new "mantra" can be...
May it be so for each of us, O our loving Abba Father! Amen!
PS I'll even let you borrow my word hold and my beloved Colossians to get you started. Just listen for Him and His speaking voice in the depths of your soul as you wait to receive from HIM!