Sandpaper & Polish: Relationships in God's Sovereign Hands

John and I have been married for 55 years. We long ago gave up our unrealistic expectations of the “perfect marriage.” But we had tried and failed and put out the efforts again and again. After all, we made our vows to God and each other.

We had bought the lie that was rampant in our early marriage — I need to kiss my personality good-bye and be the overly submissive wife to my husband who was to be the “big cheese” who always knew “the answer.” And he had to be the one to take the lead, which rarely happened.

But eventually, God gave us insights into the truth of marriage relationship (coming up in a future “Stone”).

John & jan 2023

But in the meantime, I’d like to share one of my “anniversary blogs.” It may give you a giggle or two…but more importantly, may it give perspective on your close relationships in general.

Here is my 46th anniversary blog:

I wasn't going to even write an anniversary blog this year ... I'm tired, blank, with nothing new to say. I merely posted our picture on facebook, thanking God for the godly man He gave me, calling it an "anniversary."

Then it came -- a realization as I was praying this morning, this day that commemorates that life-changing commitment 46 years ago. 

Lord,
You have used John and me as Your Sandpaper in each other's lives, haven't You? How sneaky! But how clever of You!
Our marriage was your "trick" (as one author calls it) to get Your job done in our lives.
An only child (John) marrying a first born of seven (me) -- Yikes! You gave John the "sibling" he never had to knock him off his "only child throne." And you gave this "boss of the mob" (as my mom called her first-born of seven) a partner who resists being told what to do, when, and how. Wow! No wonder the "fireworks at times."
But are we ready for polishing yet? How naive of me!
There's more sanding to do, isn't there?
Thank you for it all. The good, the hard, and everything in between. Because it's all good, because YOU are in control.
Thank you, Lord.
And would You give us a few more anniversaries, so we can see if we can graduate to the polishing phase while on this earth?
Ok, maybe not ... and that's fine if You are in it all!
Amen.